The Merry Wives of Windsor The Works of William Shakespeare [Cambridge Edition] [9 vols.] · William Shakespeare
NOTES: SCENE VII
24: _me_] _be._ 45: _a feasting_] _feasting._ 46: _bully_] _bully._ Halliwell. 48: _gesse_] _guests._ _patinces_] _patients._ _Enter syr Hugh and Simple._ [SC. VIII.] _Sir Hu._ I pray you do so much as see if you can espie Doctor _Cayus_ comming, and giue me intelligence, Or bring me vrde if you please now. _Sim._ _I_ will sir. _Sir Hu._ Ieshu ples mee, how my hart trobes, and trobes, 5 And then she made him bedes of Roses, And a thousand fragrant poses, To shallow riueres. Now so kad vdge me, my hart Swelles more and more. Mee thinks _I_ can cry Verie well. There dwelt a man in _Babylon_, 10 To shallow riuers and to falles, Melodious birds sing Madrigalles. _Sim._ Sir here is M. _Page_, and M. _Shallow_, Comming hither as fast as they can. _Sir Hu._ Then it is verie necessary _I_ put vp my sword, 15 Pray give me my cowne too, marke you. _Enter Page, shallow, and Slender._ _Pa._ God saue you sir _Hugh_. _Shal._ God saue you M. parson. _Sir Hu._ God plesse you all from his mercies sake now. _Pa._ What the word and the sword, doth that agree well? 20 _Sir Hu._ There is reasons and causes in all things, _I_ warrant you now. _Pa._ Well sir _Hugh_, we are come to crane Your helpe and furtherance in a matter.
_Sir Hu._ What is _I_ pray you? 25 _Pa._ {I}faith tis this sir _Hugh_. There is an auncient friend of ours, a man of verie good sort, so at oddes with one patience, that _I_ am sure you would hartily grieue to see him. Now sir _Hugh_, you are a scholler well red, and verie perswasiue, we would intreate you to see if you could intreat him to patience. 30 _Sir Hu._ _I_ pray you who is it? Let vs know that. _Pa._ I am shure you know him, tis Doctor _Cayus_. _Sir Hu._ _I_ had as leeue you should tel me of a messe of poredge, He is an arant lowsie beggerly knaue: 35 And he is a coward beside. _Pa._ Why Ile laie my life tis the man That he should fight withall. _Enter Doctor and the Host, they offer to fight._ _Shal._ Keep them asunder, take away their weapons. _Host._ Disarme, let them question. 40 _Shal._ Let them keepe their limbs hole, and hack our English. _Doct._ Harke van vrd in your eare. You be vn daga And de {I}ack, coward preest. _Sir Hu._ Harke you, let vs not be laughing stockes to other mens humors. By Ieshu _I_ will knock your vrinalls about your knaues cock-comes, for missing your meetings and appointments. 45 _Doct._ O Ieshu mine host of de garter, _Iohn Rogoby_, Haue _I_ not met him at de place he make apoint, Haue I not?
_Mis. For._ A plaine kercher sir _Iohn_, would fit me better. 20 _Fal._ By the Lord thou art a traitor to saie so: What made me loue thee? Let that perswade thee Ther’s somewhat extraordinarie in thee: Goe too _I_ loue thee: Mistris _Ford_, _I_ cannot cog, _I_ cannot prate, like one Of these fellowes that smels like Bucklers-berie, 25 In simple time, but _I_ loue thee, And none but thee. _Mis. For._ Sir _Iohn_, I am afraid you loue misteris _Page_. _Fal._ I thou mightest as well saie I loue to walke by the Counter gate, 30 Which is as hatefull to me As the reake of a lime kill. _Enter Mistresse Page._ _Mis. Pa._ Mistresse Ford, Mis. _Ford_, where are you? _Mis. For._ O Lord step aside good sir _Iohn_. _Falstaffe stands behind the aras._ How now Misteris _Page_, what’s the matter? 35 _Mis. Pa._ Why your husband woman is comming, With halfe _Windsor_ at his heeles, To looke for a gentleman, that he ses Is hid in his house: his wifes sweet hart. _Mis. For._ Speak louder. But _I_ hope tis not true Misteris _Page_. 40 _Mis. Pa._ Tis too true woman. Therefore if you Haue any here, away with him, or your vndone for euer. _Mis. For._ Alas mistresse _Page_, what shall _I_ do? Here is a gentleman my friend, how shall I do?
_Mis. Pa._ Gode body woman, do not stand what shal I do, and 45 what shall _I_ do. Better any shift, rather then you shamed. Looke heere, here’s a buck-basket, if hee be a man of any reasonable sise, heele in here. _Mis. For._ Alas I feare he is too big. _Fal._ Let me see, let me see, Ile in, Ile in, 50 Follow your friends counsell. _Mis. Pa._ Fie sir _Iohn_, is this your loue? Go too. (_Aside._ _Fal._ I loue thee, and none but thee: Helpe me to conuey me hence, Ile neuer come here more. 55 _Sir Iohn goes into the basket, they put cloathes ouer him, the two men carries it away: Foord meetes it, and all the rest, Page, Doctor, Priest, Slender, Shallow._ _Ford._ Come pray along, you shall see all. How now who goes heare? whither goes this? Whither goes it? set it downe. _Mis. For._ Now let it go, you had best meddle with buck-washing. 60 _Ford._ Buck, good buck, pray come along, Master _Page_ take my keyes: helpe to search. Good Sir _Hugh_ pray come along, helpe a little, a little, He shew you all. _Sir Hu._ By Ieshu these are iealosies and distemperes. 65 _Exit omnes._ _Mis. Pa._ He is in a pittifull taking. _Mis._ I wonder what he thought When my husband bad them set downe the basket.
_Sir Hu:_ You suffer for a bad conscience looke you now: 95 _{F}ord:_ Well _I_ pray no more, another time {I}le tell you all: The mean time go dine with me, pardon me wife, I am sorie; M. _{P}age_, pray goe in to dinner, Another time {I}le tell you all. _{P}a:_ Wel let it be so, and to morrow I inuite you all 100 To my house to dinner: and in the morning weele A birding, _I_ haue an excellent Hauke for the bush. _{F}ord:_ Let it be so: Come M. _{P}age_, come wife; I pray you come in all, y’are welcome, pray come in. _Sir Hu:_ By so kad vdgme, M. _{F}ordes_ is 105 Not in his right wittes: _Exit omnes:_ _Enter sir Iohn Falstaffe._ [SC. XI.] _Fal:_ _Bardolfe_ brew me a pottle sack presently: _Bar:_ With Egges sir? _Fal:_ Simply of it selfe, {I}le none of these pullets sperme {I}n my drink: goe make haste. Haue _I_ liued to be carried in a basket 5 And throwne into the Thames like a barow of Butchers offoll. Well, and I be serued such another tricke, Ile giue them leaue to take out my braines and butter them, and giue them to a dog for a new-yeares gift. Sblood, the rogues slided me in with as little remorse as if they had gone to drowne a blinde bitches puppies in the litter: and they 10 might know by my sise I haue a kind of alacritie in sinking: and the bottom had bin as deep as hell I should downe. I had bene drowned, but that the shore was sheluie and somewhat shallowe: a death that I abhorre. For you know the water swelles a man: and what a thing should I haue bene when I had bene swelled? By the Lord a 15 mountaine of money. Now is the Sacke brewed?
_Bar._ I sir, there’s a woman below would speake with you. _Fal._ Bid her come vp. Let me put some Sacke among this cold water, for my belly is as cold as if I had swallowed snow-balles for pilles. 20 _Enter Mistresse Quickly._ Now whats the newes with you? _Quic._ I come from misteris _{F}ord_ forsooth. _Fal._ Misteris _Ford_, I haue had Ford inough, _I_ haue bene throwne into the Ford, my belly is full Of Ford: she hath tickled mee. 25 _Quic._ O Lord sir, she is the sorrowfullest woman that her seruants mistooke, that euer liued. And sir, she would desire you of all loues you will meet her once againe, to morrow sir, betweene ten and eleuen, and she hopes to make amends for all. _Fal._ Ten, and eleuen, saiest thou? 30 _Quic._ I forsooth. _Fal._ Well, tell her Ile meet her. Let her but think Of mans frailtie: Let her iudge what man is, And then thinke of me. And so farwell. _Quic._ Youle not faile sir? _Exit mistresse Quickly._ 35 _Fal._ _I_ will not faile. Commend me to her. I wonder _I_ heare not of M. _Brooke_, _I_ like his Mony well. By the masse here he is. _Enter Brooke._ _For._ God saue you sir. _{F}al._ Welcome good M. _Brooke_. You come to know how matters 40 goes.
_Ford._ Well sir then my shute is void? Youle vndertake it no more? _Fal._ M. _Brooke_, {I}le be throwne into Etna As _I_ haue bene in the Thames, Ere I thus leaue her: _I_ haue receiued 80 Another appointment of meeting, Betweene ten and eleuen is the houre. _{F}ord:_ Why sir, tis almost ten alreadie: _{F}al:_ Is it? why then will _I_ addresse my selfe For my appointment: M. _Brooke_, come to me soone 85 At night, and you shall know how _I_ speed, And the end shall be, you shall enjoy her loue: You shall cuckold Foord: come to mee soone at at night. _Exit Falstaffe._ _{F}or._ {I}s this a dreame? {I}s it a vision? Maister _{F}ord_, maister _{F}ord_, awake maister _{F}ord_, 90 There is a hole made in your best coat M. _Ford_, And a man shall not onely endure this wrong, But shall stand vnder the taunt of names, _Lucifer_ is a good name, _Barbason_ good: good Diuels names: but cuckold, wittold, godeso 95 The diuel himselfe hath not such a name: And they may hang hats here, and napkins here Vpon my homes: well {I}le home, _I_ ferit him, And vnlesse the diuel himselfe should aide him. Ile search vnpossible places: {I}le about it, 100 Least I repent too late: _Exit omnes._
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