Two Gentlemen of Verona The Works of William Shakespeare [Cambridge Edition] [9 vols.] · William Shakespeare
SCENE I. _Milan. The DUKE'S Palace._
_Enter VALENTINE and SPEED._ _Speed._ Sir, your glove. _Val._ Not mine; my gloves are on. _Speed._ Why, then, this may be yours, for this is but one. _Val._ Ha! let me see: ay, give it me, it's mine: Sweet ornament that decks a thing divine! Ah, Silvia, Silvia! 5 _Speed._ Madam Silvia! Madam Silvia! _Val._ How now, sirrah? _Speed._ She is not within hearing, sir. _Val._ Why, sir, who bade you call her? _Speed._ Your worship, sir; or else I mistook. 10 _Val._ Well, you'll still be too forward. _Speed._ And yet I was last chidden for being too slow. _Val._ Go to, sir: tell me, do you know Madam Silvia? _Speed._ She that your worship loves? _Val._ Why, how know you that I am in love? 15 _Speed._ Marry, by these special marks: first, you have learned, like Sir Proteus, to wreathe your arms, like a malecontent; to relish a love-song, like a robin-redbreast; to walk alone, like one that had the pestilence; to sigh, like a school-boy that had lost his A B C; to weep, like a young 20 wench that had buried her grandam; to fast, like one that takes diet; to watch, like one that fears robbing; to speak puling, like a beggar at Hallowmas. You were wont, when you laughed, to crow like a cock; when you walked, to walk like one of the lions; when you fasted, it was presently after 25 dinner; when you looked sadly, it was for want of money: and now you are metamorphosed with a mistress, that, when I look on you, I can hardly think you my master.
_Speed._ You never saw her since she was deformed. _Val._ How long hath she been deformed? _Speed._ Ever since you loved her. _Val._ I have loved her ever since I saw her; and still I see her beautiful. 60 _Speed._ If you love her, you cannot see her. _Val._ Why? _Speed._ Because Love is blind. O, that you had mine eyes; or your own eyes had the lights they were wont to have when you chid at Sir Proteus for going ungartered! 65 _Val._ What should I see then? _Speed._ Your own present folly, and her passing deformity: for he, being in love, could not see to garter his hose; and you, being in love, cannot see to put on your hose. _Val._ Belike, boy, then, you are in love; for last morning 70 you could not see to wipe my shoes. _Speed._ True, sir; I was in love with my bed: I thank you, you swinged me for my love, which makes me the bolder to chide you for yours. _Val._ In conclusion, I stand affected to her. 75 _Speed._ I would you were set, so your affection would cease. _Val._ Last night she enjoined me to write some lines to one she loves. _Speed._ And have you? 80 _Val._ I have. _Speed._ Are they not lamely writ? _Val._ No, boy, but as well as I can do them. Peace! here she comes.
_Speed._ [_Aside_] O excellent motion! O exceeding puppet! 85 Now will he interpret to her. _Enter SILVIA._ _Val._ Madam and mistress, a thousand good-morrows. _Speed._ [_Aside_] O, give ye good even! here's a million of manners. _Sil._ Sir Valentine and servant, to you two thousand. 90 _Speed._ [_Aside_] He should give her interest, and she gives it him. _Val._ As you enjoin'd me, I have writ your letter Unto the secret nameless friend of yours; Which I was much unwilling to proceed in, 95 But for my duty to your ladyship. _Sil._ I thank you, gentle servant: 'tis very clerkly done. _Val._ Now trust me, madam, it came hardly off; For, being ignorant to whom it goes, I writ at random, very doubtfully. 100 _Sil._ Perchance you think too much of so much pains? _Val._ No, madam; so it stead you, I will write, Please you command, a thousand times as much; And yet-- _Sil._ A pretty period! Well, I guess the sequel; 105 And yet I will not name it;--and yet I care not;-- And yet take this again:--and yet I thank you; Meaning henceforth to trouble you no more. _Speed._ [_Aside_] And yet you will; and yet another 'yet.' _Val._ What means your ladyship? do you not like it? 110 _Sil._ Yes, yes: the lines are very quaintly writ; But since unwillingly, take them again. Nay, take them.
_Val._ Madam, they are for you. _Sil._ Ay, ay: you writ them, sir, at my request; 115 But I will none of them; they are for you; I would have had them writ more movingly. _Val._ Please you, I'll write your ladyship another. _Sil._ And when it's writ, for my sake read it over, And if it please you, so; if not, why, so. 120 _Val._ If it please me, madam, what then? _Sil._ Why, if it please you, take it for your labour: And so, good morrow, servant. [_Exit._ _Speed._ O jest unseen, inscrutable, invisible, As a nose on a man's face, or a weathercock on a steeple! 125 My master sues to her; and she hath taught her suitor, He being her pupil, to become her tutor. O excellent device! was there ever heard a better, That my master, being scribe, to himself should write the letter? _Val._ How now, sir? what are you reasoning with 130 yourself? _Speed._ Nay. I was rhyming: 'tis you that have the reason. _Val._ To do what? _Speed._ To be a spokesman for Madam Silvia. 135 _Val._ To whom? _Speed._ To yourself: why, she wooes you by a figure. _Val._ What figure? _Speed._ By a letter, I should say. _Val._ Why, she hath not writ to me? 140 _Speed._ What need she, when she hath made you write to yourself? Why, do you not perceive the jest?
_Val._ No, believe me. _Speed._ No believing you, indeed, sir. But did you perceive her earnest? 145 _Val._ She gave me none, except an angry word. _Speed._ Why, she hath given you a letter. _Val._ That's the letter I writ to her friend. _Speed._ And that letter hath she delivered, and there an end. 150 _Val._ I would it were no worse. _Speed._ I'll warrant you, 'tis as well: For often have you writ to her; and she, in modesty, Or else for want of idle time, could not again reply; Or fearing else some messenger, that might her mind discover, 155 Herself hath taught her love himself to write unto her lover. All this I speak in print, for in print I found it. Why muse you, sir? 'tis dinner-time. _Val._ I have dined. _Speed._ Ay, but hearken, sir; though the chameleon 160 Love can feed on the air, I am one that am nourished by my victuals, and would fain have meat. O, be not like your mistress; be moved, be moved. [_Exeunt._ Notes: II, 1. 19: _had_] _hath_ Collier MS. 21: _buried_] F1. _lost_ F2 F3 F4. 27: _you are_] _you are so_ Collier MS. 32: _Without you?_] _Without you!_ Dyce. 33: _would_] _would be_ Collier MS. 41: _my_] F1 F2. om. F3 F4. 68, 69: See note (IV). 76: _set,_] _set;_ Malone. 85, 88, 91: [Aside] Capell. 91: Speed.] F1 F4. Sil. F2 F3. 96: _for_] om. F3 F4. 102: _stead_] _steed_ Ff. 106: _name it_] _name 't_ Capell. _and yet_] _yet_ Pope. 109: [Aside] Rowe. 114: _for_] _writ for_ Anon. conj. 124, 125: Printed as prose by Pope. 129: _scribe_] _the scribe_ Pope. 137: _wooes_] _woes_ Ff. (IV. ii. 138. _woe_ F1. _wooe_ F2 F3 F4.) 149: _there_] F1. _there's_ F2 F3 F4.
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